Freddie Lyon (![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
thisflowerimagines) wrote in ![[community profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/community.png)
voyagersooc2014-04-12 07:02 pm
thisflowerimagines) wrote in voyagersooc2014-04-12 07:02 pm
TEXTS FROM LAST NIGHT
Y'ALL KNOW WHAT TO DO
Y'ALL KNOW WHAT TO DO
1. I found a door knob in my purse this morning, I hope whoever it belonged to doesn't need it today.
2. I just did the walk of shame in monkey slippers in the snow
3. WHY ARE THERE SO MANY BURPS IN MY SMALL, INCREDIBLY ATTRACTIVE BODY
2. I just did the walk of shame in monkey slippers in the snow
3. WHY ARE THERE SO MANY BURPS IN MY SMALL, INCREDIBLY ATTRACTIVE BODY
1. you missed 2am bagpipes and my roommate looking hot as fuck in a kilt
2. Naked snow angels was a very bad idea.
3. There's going to be a velveeta shortage. I'm not drunk any more, this is just dire info.
2. Naked snow angels was a very bad idea.
3. There's going to be a velveeta shortage. I'm not drunk any more, this is just dire info.
1. I need vitamin water and Jesus :/
2. He texts me "what are you wearing" in the middle of the workday, so naturally I assume he's kidding and respond "the blood of my enemies" #foreveralone
3. He kept asking for nudes so I sent him a picture of another guy's dick. He called me ruthless.
2. He texts me "what are you wearing" in the middle of the workday, so naturally I assume he's kidding and respond "the blood of my enemies" #foreveralone
3. He kept asking for nudes so I sent him a picture of another guy's dick. He called me ruthless.
1. I need a drink and a shade of lipstick that will put the fear of God in a man's heart.
2. Good night I hope you dream about knitting and threesomes
3. You don't know how much I love him. He could play Careless Whisper while we have sex and I'd still love him.
2. Good night I hope you dream about knitting and threesomes
3. You don't know how much I love him. He could play Careless Whisper while we have sex and I'd still love him.
1. I'm gone to the point of literally hugging trees, partially for support, but also because I like them.
2. So when's a good time this week to show up at your apartment in nothing but a trench coat and a bow? Y'know. Hypothetically.
3. It would be awesome if I knew whose teeth these were in my pocket
2. So when's a good time this week to show up at your apartment in nothing but a trench coat and a bow? Y'know. Hypothetically.
3. It would be awesome if I knew whose teeth these were in my pocket
1. Question #1: Why am I on my living room floor? Question #2: Where did the bloody footprints come from? Question #3: Why are there two McChickens next to the wine bottle?
2. Just accidentally flashed my junk to the lady helping me try on suits, it was cold in there, I don't think she was impressed.
3. Sure go ahead and start this 'business' with him...just don't come crying to me when you have to fake your own death in two years
2. Just accidentally flashed my junk to the lady helping me try on suits, it was cold in there, I don't think she was impressed.
3. Sure go ahead and start this 'business' with him...just don't come crying to me when you have to fake your own death in two years
I was proudly and successfully the first girl ever to get kicked out of a the bar for being too drunk last night. Loving spring break.
Because making bad decisions is what makes our house great and I don't plan on changing that anytime soon.
Dude get here. I just re-invented nachos. For real though. They werent real before right now
Edited 2014-04-13 04:23 (UTC)
Lack of response to this text gains you a half hour of freedom before I initiate operations to conclude you are not, in fact, comatose. You requested no mercy.
❶ you texted me last night to tell me you had invented a new food: cheese-less grilled cheese. congratulations, you made toast.
❷ you tried to wear your jesus costume into family christian stores and say it was a book signing.
❸ when you wake up, i have a unicorn coloring book, crayons, mini cupcakes, and booze.
❷ you tried to wear your jesus costume into family christian stores and say it was a book signing.
❸ when you wake up, i have a unicorn coloring book, crayons, mini cupcakes, and booze.
tequila does seem to be your mortal enemy. just remember you asked this of us.
not that i'm completely against strangers turning up in nothing but a trenchcoat and a bow, but.... who is this?
1. i woke up in my bathtub clutching two empty bottles of wine?
2. brb going to narnia
3. the more shots i drink the more determined i am to try pole dancing.
2. brb going to narnia
3. the more shots i drink the more determined i am to try pole dancing.
Edited 2014-04-13 11:17 (UTC)
What else do you need to make nachos special? They're nachos.
so mortal that the music that plays for the dramatic chipmunk video sounds off whenever i order it. [which is hilarious given he shifts into one of those >_>] i remember! i might not remember at the time i'm being tackled but i do now....
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